Keeping the Peace Series 2, Episode 3 – Working as a Firearms Officer
Alexis: Hello and welcome to the Keeping the Peace podcast with me, Alexis Powell-Howard. In this second series, we’re exploring the challenges of different roles in policing and how officers and staff manage their self-care when undertaking challenging roles. Today, I’m really pleased to be joined Barry Calder, who’s a firearms officer and Steven Hartshorn, ex-firearms office and Fed rep. Hi, guys, how you doing?
Steve: Good afternoon. Good, thank you, how’s things?
Alexis: Yeah, good, thank you. How are you, Barry, you OK?
Barry: I’m very well, thank you very much, nice to be here.
Alexis: Yeah, thank you, thanks for coming to join me. Do you want to kind of introduce yourself a little bit in terms of your background in policing and how long you’ve been in the job for and that kind of thing? If I come to you first, Barry, would you be able to do that?
Barry: Certainly. I’ve been in the job for 29 years, you know, almost to the day in fact, I think next week 29 years in. I’ve had a really good, varied career, you know. I did about four, five years as a response officer on a well, back in those days they were called relief officers. I then became a sort of uniformed crime squad type home beat officer for a very busy area of the West End of London, Leicester Square, which was great fun to work in, really good fun.
And then after being in that particular area for about 12 years, I got threatened with tenure – the policy at the time of moving police officers about. So I thought rather than being sent somewhere I didn’t want to go, I’d better start looking for a nice job, you know, something that I’ll enjoy. So I was just looking through that first day of thinking about it and there was an advert for a special firearms command armed response vehicle officers. And I can remember I had a friend in it and the stories he told me, how much he enjoyed the work and I thought, “That sounds good, I’ll give that a go.” And then so every since then, back in 2003, 2004, I’ve been a firearms office. Specialist firearms command for 13, 13 and a half years and a protection officer, uniformed protection officer for royalty protection for the last five years.
Alexis: Wow, that sounds incredible. OK, I’m looking forward to hearing about that, thank you for that. How about for you, Steve?
Steve: Yeah, good afternoon. I feel like an amateur compared to Barry, I’ve only got 26 years in the job, still a baby. For me, I did 10 years out in east London before – it was always my career goal to become part of the firearms command, I wanted to be part of something different and very challenging. So 10 years on an outer borough and then went to the firearms command in about 2005. And then whilst I was there, I became involved in incidents and how we looked after colleagues, so I thought, I know, I’ll become a Federation rep because that was the way that we could facilitate the welfare and support to colleagues.
So took an additional role in 2008 as a Fed rep and that gradually sort of took over my interests, where I became the full-time Federation rep for the same firearms command that Barry was in at the end of 2012. And then remained there until 2018 where I suppose for my efforts and my skillset that I’d acquired, I was able to move over to the National Police Federation of England and Wales as part of the national board and become the UK lead for firearms, taser and post-incident procedures. So it’s all worked out quite naturally really in how my career has flowed on the back of other jobs and working to make sure that we can look after our colleagues as best as we possibly can.
Alexis: Absolutely, sounds amazing. OK, so I mean, obviously for me, as somebody who’s obviously not in the police and, you know, trying to understand about being a firearms office, but it sounds like both of you kind of deliberately went that direction and have had amazing careers in that as well. What do you think has been the kind of amazing part of the job, what’s the bit that you absolutely love about it? If I come to you first, Steve?
Steve: That’s a tough question. It’s one of the questions that get asked when you want to go to the department of why do you want to go there.
Alexis: [Laughs] It’s like an interview.
Steve: Yeah, it is really. It’s an incredibly challenging post because when you’re working on a local area, you deal with a certain level of criminality. And then when you decide to go to a specialist command, such as firearms, you’re taken on a different tier of crime, where they’ve got access to lethal weapons, they’ve got very scant regard for human life, or even respect for human life. And for me, it was in that challenge to take everything that I’d learnt as a beat officer, response officer doing earlies, lates and nights, and challenging myself but also working with a team of professionals who all wanted to be there.
And that’s the thing with firearms is you volunteer to go there so everybody’s motivated to the same goals and aims as to be the best you possibly can, to do a really good job and to try and take away some of that level of criminality that is just a horrible and really detrimental affect to the public and colleagues across the UK. And I’ve yet to find anything that is as rewarding for me, personally, and that was my main driver for being there really.
Alexis: It sounds incredibly rewarding. Is it the same thing for you, Barry, or are there other things that you love about it?
Barry: Yeah, my time in the specialist firearms command, well, you know, putting it down into one sentence, it was all about saving lives. You know, whether, as Steve said, you know, some of the criminals we came up against, they had just no regard at all for human life and they would be carrying weapons, firearms, machetes, you know, all sorts of things. They’d be quite prepared to use them on armed officers or members of the public should they try and stop them. You know, a lot of the operations that I was involved in over the years was, you know, intelligence-led operations where we’d received information that, you know, criminal A was on his way to murder, a lot of the time, criminal B.
And, you know, we’d be putting in the intervention, we’d be stopping those persons en route, you know, to do that. They’d be pulled out of a vehicle, you know, very safely, obviously, making sure it was safe for all, as much as possible. And they’d have a loaded firearm or any other types of weapons and it’d be just that thought of walking away thinking, “Well, what we did tonight, it’s not going to make the news, you know. There’s been nothing traumatic, there’s been nothing really bad happens, we’ve stopped a bad guy with a gun and we’ve saved someone’s life.”
And just the thought of that as well, and that sort of leads on to some of the other training we were lucky to get within the specialist firearms command. I was one of the medics so, a lot of the times, we’d be first on scene to a police – sorry, not police shootings but shootings where the area was still deemed too dangerous before they could send paramedics in. And it would be our job to obviously keep victims going as best we could until we could hand them over to the ultimate professionals, whether that be paramedics or the helicopter emergency medical service.
And again, I genuinely couldn’t count how many times I’ve been on my hands and knees giving people first aid and keeping them going until they got proper, good, professional help. And you walk away again, knowing we did something good tonight, we saved someone. And it’s just, as corny as it may sound, it just makes you feel good when you walk away from that. And the work is probably some of the most enjoyable work I’ve ever done.
Alexis: I was just thinking, in terms of that job satisfaction really, and actually as well, part of it is, I guess it’s good if it doesn’t end up in the papers and it’s not something that’s reported on, because you’ve done a good job, you know, it hasn’t gone that far. So stepping in and either stopping something from happening or, you know, that intervention, as you said, it’s like you’re kind of changing that whole course, aren’t you? And actually the public probably won’t be aware of that but for you, you know that you’ve done that and it’s been really, incredibly important to be that person who stops it or that team that stops it.
Barry: Definitely so. I think if you’re after public praise, my advice would be never be a firearms officer. [Laughs] You know, because the only time the public really get to hear about things in depth and in detail, is where, whether it be an operation or an incident, hasn’t gone the way we want it to go and shots may have been fired. As I said, you know, it’s only bad news that sells, you know, makes it onto the media significantly and, you know, 99.9% of our work involves saving lives. We’re there simply just to stop bad guys hurting other people and being there just to, you know, try and prevent, you know, victims dying or being seriously injured.
Alexis: Yeah, OK, yeah, that makes sense. So just from a – because I was just thinking there, as Barry was talking, Steve, that you must have to have an incredible team around you that you rely on and that you absolutely can trust that they’ve got your back and I guess that comes from the training. But is, how important is that kind of team aspect? Whether it’s the camaraderie of it and some of that dark humour that I know kind of gets bandied about, or whether it’s, you know, just that support when you’re, you know, on an operation, if you like?
Steve: Yeah, it’s crucial; you literally do put your life in your colleagues’ hands. If ever we’re doing, what we call, a limited entry into a premises, you know, going to execute a warrant to try and arrest and detain some of these people, you might be going through the door first into a room and your number two, who is literally right behind you on your shoulder, is going in the room and they are, they’re covering you. They are your safety net in case there is someone hidden behind the door that you just can’t deal with, they’re, you know, I’ve never found a more professional team of people who have all got the same goal of trying to achieve safe objective but also be very professional in how they do that. And it’s reassuring that you know everyone has gone through the same course, the same level of training, has got the same professional approach. Not only dealing with the job but dealing with anything that might come from that job.
And as Barry’s mentioned, sometimes you hear in the press it’s gone wrong, shots have been fired, someone’s been killed. It’s not gone wrong, it’s what you train for and that’s a bit hard for members of the public, but also at times I think for senior officers to understand. We train for that, that shots may have to be fired in response to a situation and that the level of training you get, you know, over the many shootings that we’ve had across the UK, certainly that I’ve, I suppose, lucky enough to have dealt with as a Federation rep, that every officer said, you know, the training has been so good it has been like a training scenario which prepared them really, really well to deal with the situation, the shots fired.
But also the post-shooting care, because what perhaps many people don’t realise is that as an officer, you may have to engage and take a shot which may be fatal or otherwise. But then you immediately drop on to doing first aid to care for that person you’ve shot, which is just as important, you know, you have responsibilities to these people but that never seems to get teased out in the press, that we’ve gone from what people might term as an aggressor to a carer. And you literally do it within a split second because you don’t want anybody to die. You’re there to make that job as safe as you possibly can but unfortunately, and one my colleagues sort of said this many years ago, is the public aren’t part of the briefings. They don’t know to stand still and put their hands up and almost surrender. You know, you’ve got this fight or flight ability and people want to fight and fight because they don’t want to do a serious length of time in prison. So it’s very rewarding to be part of that, I think very highly-skilled team of officers.
Alexis: You’re listening to the Keeping the Peace podcast, produced in collaboration between Oscar Kilo, the National Police Wellbeing Service and Fortis Therapy and Training.
I think as well, when you’re describing it like that, you know, that you’ve gone from having to manage and incident and what’s going on then to kind of caring for somebody that’s been injured, you’re absolutely right, that isn’t teased out, is it? That’s not, it’s not kind of something that’s spoken about or acknowledged in terms of that level of training and then what you’re having to do as part of your role within that job, if you like. I was thinking there as well, that I think a lot of people maybe think about it in terms of looking at it as it would be in a movie. You know, you’ve kind of got those ideas, those ways of how those things might pan and it’s not at all like that. Barry, does that kind of frustrate you a bit that you kind of those, there’s those views in the public, if you like, but actually the reality is quite different?
Barry: Yeah, Hollywood has got a lot to answer for, you know. I’m a big film buff, you know, just as much as the next person, I love a good action film but none of it’s real. You know, I’ve been involved in many incidents over the years, I know many of my colleagues have, you know. I’ll read things in the press, you know, you’ll get people that – you know, journalists or people on the social media giving opinions, “Why didn’t criminal A get shot in the hand? You know, that would have made him.” No, it wouldn’t, because all he’d do is pick the gun up with the other hand, you know.
There’s so much that we see, you know, in films, that are just completely made up. A subject getting hit with one round, one bullet and they’re no longer a threat. Well, you know, sometimes, somebody has to be hit with multiple rounds. We have to stop the threat, you know, when it comes to that and if that threat is only stopped after two bullets are fired at them, that’s good. If that threat continues and 20 bullets are to be fired at them, then that’s the same job, it’s stopping that threat. We’re not there to kill. We know, as a consequence of firing those rounds, the chances of killing that person are off the scale, so hot. But we’re not there to kill, we just want to stop that threat, we want to stop it there and then so no-one’s at any more risk.
But, yeah, unfortunately, as Steve said, people don’t have the same briefings as us, they’re not aware of how people react, in the very strange ways they react as well. You know, it’s panic sometimes. We’re aware of that so, you know, a lot of police shootings, the ones that I’m aware of, police officers tend to wait probably more than they should, putting themselves really at risk, you know, to give those people the absolutely opportunity to give themselves up, stopping a threat. And if that carries on though the inevitably, the shots will be fired.
Alexis: Yeah, that’s the job you’ve got to do, isn’t it? That’s the reality of doing the job as well. Steve, when I said that about the movies, I saw you laugh there about, you know, because I know it’s something that’s kind of so far from reality. How do you kind of think about that in terms of the people who are doing the job and how they might be perceived by others? Because I suppose as soon as you say firearms, potentially, in some people’s head, it’s like you’re going to have to take a life. But actually the way that you’re, both of you are speaking about it, is about the threat and about saving lives and actually stopping incidences. It’s a very different perspective, isn’t it, to what you’d kind of imagine, I guess, without understanding it.
Steve: Yeah, it’s completely different and Barry kind of touched on it when he talked about Hollywood. And over the time, I’ve coined the phrase the Hollywood effect because you get the sort of, the social media type, the journalist who have a perception of what a gun does to a person, you know. They get shot, they go flailing backwards with their arms moving round in these grotesque scenes, or you’ve got muzzle flash everywhere. And quite often, there’s none of that. Officers have told me that when they’ve pulled the trigger and they’ve watched it, it has gone into slow motion for them. Sometimes they don’t perhaps realise the impact of the bullet at the time because they’re so focussed on looking at the threat of the weapon.
You’ve then got the public who expect a certain thing and a certain reaction when they see or hear something. There is a kind of the good side to that Hollywood effect though in that if you look at the use of taser and laser dots on people, because they’ve seen it all on, in films and in dramas, they instinctively know that if that laser light is there, it’s either a gun or a taser. Some people have put their hands up and gone, “All right, I give up,” because they know that there is an immediate threat to them. Which is kind of good, I just wish it had the same effect on everybody and they all realised that look, if armed police are there, it’s for a reason because there’s a really credible threat to life and that we’re there to deal with it as safely as we possibly can.
And it was interesting, when I first joined the command, my first boss, he sort of took me in the first 10 minutes and said, “Right, Steve, I’m here to make your job safe, I want you to enjoy it,” he said, “And I will never, ever put you in a position, hopefully, where you may have to take a shot.” He said, “But if I do, you’ll be there for the right reasons, because it’s been deemed so serious that it needs a firearms response.” And for me, being sort of relatively young, brand-new to the department, I’m thinking, “Hang on a minute, I want to get involved in doing my job.” But then when you go away and have a chat with more experienced people, and go, “You’ll never guess what the boss said.” They’ll go, “Yeah, and that’s what we’re there for.” And it was a really good levelling chat that, you know, I joined the command in 2005, I’ve never forgotten it to this day and it’s a really good mantra that, you know, we are there to do the job as safe as we can.
But ultimately there is a side where you may have to pull, squeeze the trigger my instructor colleagues would say, squeeze the trigger and a life may be taken. And that’s the reality of why they’re there but I’ve yet to meet anybody who’s actually joined and said, “Yeah, I definitely want to do that.” On the contrary, they don’t, but they want to be part of an amazing team of officers that can do that job and they don’t want the limelight, quite the opposite. When cameras turn up, they want to disappear, they want to get in their vehicles and go back to the base, do their evidential accounts, have a cup of tea and go home and, you know, blend away. And that’s the reality for many, many officers.
Alexis: Absolutely. I was thinking when you were talking earlier that, you know, you said about that fight or flight response and obviously when someone’s been caught or, you know, you want them to stop and they’re not stopping, and you get those reactions and, as you said, Barry, there’s those really kind of strange reactions that people have when they’re in those situations as well. Because there must be times when, you know, you’ve felt under threat and felt scared and you know have to – I know the training kicks in so it becomes more like a kind of cognitive thing. It’s almost like a muscle reflex and, you know, a mental reflex, isn’t it? But how do you kind of manage those feelings? Because I guess you must have to suppress some of that in order to be able to think clearly and to be able to do the job. Is that something that you do in your training or is that something you learn with experience? If I come to you first, Barry?
Barry: You know, the training we get, it is second to none, you know, it’s fantastic. Over the years, I’ve been very lucky, I’ve had some awesome instructors, exceptional. But I think the difficulty is, in any sort of training, you’re always going to know that that subject in the training environment, in front of you, is not going to take your life. You will always know that, that’s there. You know, you’ve got to act proportionally, you’ve got to act in a responsible manner, you’ve got to obviously perform as if it was all real.
But then you’ll go onto the street and you’ll face that person. You know, you’ll be walking down towards a subject, you know, a male, let’s say for instance, who you have information they’ve got a gun in their pocket. They’ll turn round, you know, you’ll give a challenge, “Stop, armed police, show your hands, show your hands.” Very loud, very nice, very clear, you know so that they’re under no illusion that they know what to do but also so that other people around you know exactly what you’re doing and what you’re telling them to do as well.
But, you know, it’s those thoughts at the time. It’s all very instinctive, it’s all very natural, it’s – robotic’s the wrong term, I suppose it’s instilled into your training. But usually it’s not till afterwards you think, “Blimey, you know, I saw his hand hovering towards his pocket, you know, he could have taken a gun out there, that was close.” You know, and it’s not till afterwards you have, I think the fullness of the incident really starts to begin to hit home. We’ve obviously got, you know, we’ve talked about flight or fight but for us, you know, I don't think I don't know anyone that gets a bit scared, gets a bit nervous when they’ve been in those situations.
And of course, there’s the adrenalin as well, you know, and the adrenalin does keep you going and if you’ve been involved in something particularly horrible, particularly nasty, I’ve had it before, I’ve sat down and I’ve actually been shaking afterwards, you know, after the incident. I’ve been all right during it and even when everything’s turned out OK, had a laugh, said to the guys, “Right, let’s get back in the car, go back, you know, so we can crack on with our statements, get the evidence all completed.” I’ve sat in the car and I can remember thinking, “I’m shaking here,” you know. And I realise I’ve just had a big fright and it’s only just really sinking in now how I feel.
So, yeah, the training’s very important but it can never instil the real world, it just physically can’t. I wish it could, you know, there’s all different aspects of training, you know, there’s live stooges that we can use and instructors playing the bad guys. We’ve got judgement ranges, you know, where it’s like a big video range in front of us where it all takes place. But it’s not real. It’s as close as you can get but you know in the back of your head it’s not real. So I don't think you can really prepare for being a bit scared, being a bit nervous. I think if someone told me they weren’t scared or a bit concerned about going into an incident where someone could kill you or a colleague, I’d be more worried about the person telling me they weren’t than –
Alexis: Yeah, I was just thinking the same thing. Actually, that’s a natural reaction, isn’t it, and you need that time to process, kind of almost like physiologically as well. Your body’s kind of catching up with what’s just happened, the adrenaline and all that response that you have in that shaking you just described, you need time to catch up with what’s just happened, isn’t it? Because it all happens so fast, as well, potentially, so you haven’t had chance to do that. So yeah, it’s a worry if you don’t feel that, isn’t it, because it’s a natural reaction to being under threat, I guess.
Barry: It’s a completely natural reaction and again, we’re all individuals and people deal with these things in, you know, their own separate different ways. Me, I’d have a little bit of a shake and then I was a bit old-fashioned; once I’d had a cup of tea or a cup of coffee, you know, everything was right with the world then.
Alexis: Thank God for tea is all I can say. [Laughs]
Barry: Exactly.
Alexis: Have a brew, it’ll all be fine.
Barry: Everything’s fine after one of them. And –
Alexis: [Laughs] Carry on, sorry, go on.
Barry: Yeah, so everyone deals with things in their own way but you know, we were quite lucky because one of the processes that we, you know, that I did when I was in specialist firearms command, and I know they still do it now. After every job, after every incident, the guys would go off, separately of course – when I say separately, you know do their own individual evidence, take care of that, get that completed. And once that’s done, so there’s no more evidence to be written up, the guys would all sit down together and they would have a debrief. And it would be about, and this would be every job, what went wrong, you know, what went well, what could we do better? And it’s all about improving our performance, making things safer for us.
You know, if there was anything really glaringly obvious, of concern, we would raise it with the bosses so they could feed back into the training environment. Also doing that as well, it was you and your colleagues having a chat and, to me, that was diffusing as well. So that was another way of getting rid of, you know, this, any problems that may happen afterwards, you were sitting down and chatting about the incident with a colleague and being able to process it bit by bit, almost like telling each other a story.
Alexis: Yeah, it’s so important, it’s so important to talk about, talk it out, isn’t it? I think that’s one of the things, I know when we see officers for therapy, often they’ve been in circumstances where they haven’t had the opportunity to do that, that kind of debrief or TRIM process or, just even talking to a colleague and it hasn’t happened. And then what’s kind of remained stuck in terms of that trauma, I suppose, is the thing that can make people quite unwell. So especially with a job like that, it feels like that’s got to be a crucial part of, it’s part of the job, isn’t it?
It’s just got to be part of any incident, I guess. Steve, from your perspective, because obviously as a Fed rep and having, you know, been doing that now for a long time and representing people and supporting people, how do you see people kind of reacting and responding to these, you know, from a. We’ve just talked there about, you know, supressing or maybe processing that response and those feelings after the event. But, you know, there must be difficulties around that, sometimes, for people.
Steve: Yeah, I’ve seen a real sort of variation in how people cope and react to – I mean, normally whenever shots have been fired and then it’s been declared a critical incident, we go through what’s called a post-incident procedure, PIP. Whereby everybody involved will return to a venue and for us, it just happened to be our base at Leman Street in east London. And then we’d call, the Federation would get called out, our solicitors would be called out, our post-incident manager, our professional standards and also the, depending on the severity of the shooting, if it was fatal, it would be the IOPC. If it was non-fatal, it might not be them, it might just be professional standards.
So you’ve have officers returning at various stages and it’s hard for people to understand but sometimes you get a sense of elation when people come back because they’ve survived something. They’ve been involved in a high threat and risk incident where they’ve neutralised the threat and it’s not until they stop, physically stop, take the kit off and go, “Wow, I’ve just come through something here where I’ve either pulled the trigger or my colleague’s pulled the trigger, I’ve been right next to them.” And then they start that processing of dealing with what’s just happened in front of them. If, you know, in the rare event that they do have to pull the trigger or if shots are fired or a threat is posed to a colleague, they start to think about that and go, “I’ve just survived it.” And they’re glad to have survived it.
And to perhaps the casual onlooker, that sense of elation might seem inappropriate or disproportionate but to that officer, it’s massive. It’s the adrenalin dump kicking in, thinking, “Wow, I’ve gone through it.” I’ve seen people come back who I’ve thought are in a really sort of dire place because they just look quite morose and are very quiet but I’ve learnt over the years, everybody processes things differently and it’s just their sort of internal coping process that they need to get to grips with something first because they know what’s coming. They know they’re going to have to sit down at some point, to provide an evidential account. I’d like to think they realise they had some really good support in terms of legal, welfare, Federation.
But also colleague and peer support, which is, I think that’s probably the unsung hero of everything that we’ve ever done as firearms officers, is the people you work with really are your rock. They’re there because they’ve lived and breathed the same experience as you and even if they’ve never pulled the trigger, they probably know someone that has or have been aware of it and they know exactly what that means to somebody. Because then there’s going to be probably quite a lengthy investigation process where they will provide that evidential account of their, not only their physical actions but their thoughts.
And going back to the early part about fear, you know, if you’ve got no fear, how can you write down in your evidential account that you had an honest-held belief and a fear that something would happen to either yourself or your colleagues? You can’t. It’s only natural to have the fear. And when officers intervene, we’ve already talked about the fight or flight response but you’ve also got the freeze response. Hopefully you can capture the subject in that freeze moment where you don’t have to pull the trigger. But also it’s the same for officers, they might freeze as well because sometimes they’re thinking, “Right, do I need to do this? Is it the safest response,” or they’re perhaps considering other tactical options, “Is someone else in a better position to do it?” And everyone’s got what we call a different line in the sand of when they may respond to that specific threat.
And, you know, we’ve had incidents where a subject has pointed the gun maybe not at the officer but at other people. Officers have had to pull the trigger because they’ve perceived a threat towards other people, other officers who are armed. And even though, you know, firearms officers have got body armour on, ballistic helmets, ballistic shields, a bullet is a very fast and small thing that, if it’s aimed properly and there’s a deficiency in that protection, it can kill, potentially. Guns and bullets were designed to kill, they weren’t designed as play things. And that’s the reality that firearms officers are up against and having to deal with that.
It takes quite a lot of internal thinking to make sure that you’ve done the right thing when you’ve had to pull the trigger. Because you know there’s going to be critics who are going to be poring over it in minute detail for days, weeks, months even years, to make sure you’ve done the right thing in law. And invariably, they have because the training has provided that, that as long as they’ve got an honest-held belief and it’s reasonable and they’ve done everything they can to mitigate. They’ve gone through, sort of, doing nothing to talking to communicating to maybe other less-lethal responses, there is only one other ultimate option to that immediate threat to life is a response with an immediate threat to life.
You know, I think most of my colleagues would agree if anybody can develop something that can counteract the need to use a firearm, bring it on, please do. Because it would be nice where we didn’t have to get to that point where human beings have to take the life of another human being. But until then, there is a job to be done and we have to do it as safe as we possibly can.
Alexis: Absolutely. And when you were saying that, I was thinking that, internally, that kind of internal dialogue that’s going on all the time, it’s almost like a risk assessment. It’s a strategy, it’s, you know, consideration of the rest of the people that you’re there with. Everything’s going on, isn’t it, and trying to weigh up constantly what’s the right course of action. And I think that process then of being investigated after that, you know, it’s incredibly hard. You know, I’ve worked with officers who’ve gone through investigations and they can go on for, as you’ve said, years. And it’s just hanging there all the time, isn’t it? And the kind of, you might fully know that you’ve done absolutely the right thing in the moment and you’ve got all the evidence to prove that.
But until that decision’s made, it’s just there and ongoing and I think that can be really stressful. Especially if, like you say, it’s actually the last course of action that you would want to take. You’ve tried everything else you possibly can beforehand and that can be quite, that can be the part, I think, that I’ve seen, that creates that ripple effect after an event, an incident. Rather than, potentially the incident itself, if that makes sense. You’re nodding there, Barry, can you relate to that? Can you see that?
Barry: Yes, I can. Obviously I’m not going to talk about the incident in too much detail, it would be unfair. But, you know, a number of years ago, I unfortunately shot and killed someone. You know, we did, that day, we did everything we possibly could not to, you know, none of us wanted to do that. You know, I was one of the officers that pulled the trigger, I didn’t want to do it. And, as you said, that then foregoes. You know, Steve’s already mentioned the post-incident process, so we have to then go, step into that. So then, at the time, that takes away the options that we’ve got to debrief. We can’t, it’s evidence, you know.
We’ve got to, you know, go through, quite rightly, an inquest process where we’ve got to fully justify and explain why we’ve done what we’ve done. The incident I was involved in, from the shooting to the inquest where I gave evidence, was two and a half years. And all I wanted to do, you know, in the face of lots of horrible stuff on social media, lots of horrible things in the press – and it’s not just me. You know, I’m big enough and ugly enough to deal with a lot of the things that are said but, you know, when I’ve got my poor old mum, you know, speaking to me on the phone, you know, saying that she’s just read some commentator in a newspaper saying that I should be charged with murder. You know, not being named but my mum knows it’s me because, you know, with hindsight, you know, if it was ever to happen to me again, I wouldn’t tell her because I wouldn’t want her to go through that.
But we want to sing from the rooftops why we’ve done what we’ve done. We want to tell the world but we are very, very restricted in when we can do that. And it’s only until you go and give that evidence, you know, at an inquest, that you can do so. And of course, you know, that inquest is difficult in itself as well because yes, you may have that anonymity, you know, from the press and the public, but you don’t have that anonymity in person, facially, you know, with the coroner, with the jury, with the, all the barristers, you know, the person’s family who you have shot and killed.
You know, I gave evidence and I must have been about 10 feet standing away from them with them all looking at me. And I couldn’t have felt worse for them, you know, but I was sick to the stomach having to explain why I killed their son, brother, etc., in front of them. You know, fully justifying it but knowing that they’re having to listen to that as well. You know, it’s just, there’s no winners, you know, there’s no winners at all. And as you said, you know, things go round and round in your head, the process taking that sort of length of time, you know, it’s not good. There’s no winners because families are left wanting to know why, officers are wanting to tell why. And, as I said, there’s no winners.
Alexis: No, everyone’s in limbo, aren’t they? Everyone’s waiting for some kind of conclusion, I guess. You’re right, absolutely, no winners at all. Do you think, I mean, thank you for sharing that as well, I appreciate you talking about that because I think it’s important that these things are talked about on this podcast, that’s the point of it really. And I think, Steve, from your perspective, do you think that it’s possible to prepare officers for that? You know, actually be able to, you know, I guess, have that within the training or to support officers so that they can feel that they can get through that kind of more easily. But it’s so difficult, isn’t it, to kind of prepare people for that situation?
Steve: I certainly think it’s possible but it’s almost like an anti-advert to come to the department, as if, you know, “Come to the department. You may shoot somebody and here’s what can happen; of trapped in investigations and having your name dragged through social media as being a cop kills family man.” And that’s not the reality. The physical training, the tactical training, the, I think is the best in the world in this country, it’s phenomenal. The level of skill that they put into training you to do your job properly is second to none. But for me, and it’s becoming sort of more prevalent now, looking at other investigations, that there isn’t really training that prepares you in how to take a life.
Certainly for me, one of the questions joining the firearms command was, you know, are you prepared to take a life? And you’re taught, “Yes, I am, I’ve thought about it, I’ve given it consideration.” But do we, do we actually know what it’s like? We never get to speak to a trigger puller because, in UK law, armed police are the only people that can take a life legitimately. You look at the military, they’re doing it in the theatre of war. There is no-one else that is charged to do that duty but we don’t get to speak to them before you join. So you have this notion of, “I’ll be fine, you know, it’s easy, it’s quite remote.” It’s not.
I’ve represented people that have been six to eight feet away from the person and they’ve then pulled the trigger. And unfortunately that person has died because of that and that’s huge. And as much as we can sit down and go through the process of, right, you’re going to pull the trigger and then that’s going to finish the incident and we’re all going to return to the PIP venue. The investigation at the scene will take place, the body will be recovered, the family will be info¬rmed. That’s got to have an impact on an individual. It’s certainly impacted on, sort of, me as Fed rep, on looking at colleagues and how they cope with that.
But it’s making me question is there more that could be done in the training and I think there is, I think there needs to be more, I’m sort of stuck for words, softer skills. Is it psychological preparation maybe, around what it actually means for people to talk around what they’ve done, you know. Everyone copes with a shooting differently. For some people, it’s a job of work, other people are taking it, “Wow, this is really affecting me now,” and it gets quite involved that they may not want to continue in a firearms career. But I would like to see more thought given to, in the initial training and continuation training around what it actually means to you when you do pull the trigger. Let’s talk about the time that you will be off operational duty and it sounds a bit crass but you won’t be with your team, perhaps you won’t be earning overtime. You may have a period of time where you’re just doing Monday to Friday, nine to five whilst the investigation takes place. It could be 12 months, two years, five years before you get an end resolution on that and what does that mean to you?
You know, and as Barry’s already said, you talk to family. I know of officers who have not told anybody other than their immediate partner because of the way families are made up; there’s some good, some bad. That you know that maybe that second cousin twice removed may well go speaking to someone in the press and suddenly, the press have got an avenue to find out who this person is. Then they do all that background check on social media, find you drunk at a party and suddenly there’s the picture of you with a beer bottle and there’s the picture of someone you’ve shot as a family person with their kids. And you think, “Hang on a minute, what are they trying to say here?”
So it’s not just that emotional side that affects officers, it’s what gets played out upon them, their families, their friends. And it’s almost as if people want to set up a firearms officer to fail. I’ve yet to meet a single person that goes out, that carries a gun in UK armed policing, that wants to have to do that. They just want to do their job. But I do think there is more that could be done, sort of pre-shooting, to make them realise. Not to put them off but to make them understand that, you know, it is impactive. You may wake up in the middle of the night having terrors; it may seem irrational to other people but that’s what can happen. If you look at – people get assaulted and it leads to PTSD. My colleague’s pulled the trigger, that can lead to PTSD because they have to –
Alexis: Absolutely.
Steve: And I don't think it’s been thought about properly in policing terms for a long time but it’s becoming more prevalent now through what my colleagues – and not just in the firearms but road traffic, custody, response policing, detectives, any kind of serious investigation that affects you in a big way, it’s got to have a profound, long-lasting effect. And, you know, it takes quite a long time for those issues to manifest themselves and I think we’re beginning to start to see a bit of the tip of the iceberg now on how it’s affecting people. But things like this can help because it’s only human to say, “Yeah, that’s affected me,” and let’s talk about it in a grown-up way, an adult conversation to make other people realise that yes, they can do the job and they can get through it and cope with it.
Alexis: Absolutely, and there’s that support network as well, to help to do that as well because I think that’s the other thing that, you know, in those examples you’ve just given there, both of you actually, that, you know if something like that happens and that post-incident investigation is going on, you can end up in the position of do I protect my family from what is going on? Which then, in turn, protects me but then it reduces the people you can actually get support from. And there’s an element of isolation there, as well, isn’t there? So all of that, if you think about from a trauma perspective, all the things that we would suggest that you maybe need if you’re trying to process trauma and, you know, overcome those feelings, some of that actually has been removed. Just because of the process and the position you might put yourself in to protect others, I think. Does that fit for you, Barry, does that kind of feel like that’s?
Barry: Yeah, you know, it does and as I said, throughout my career as a firearms officer, obviously I’ve fired shots and killed someone on one occasion, I was a tactical adviser on another fatal shooting but also first on scene on multiple occasions, you know, where persons have been shot. That all leaves a trace, it does all leave a trace. And, you know, a lot of the more horrible, a lot of the more graphic things are dealt with, as Steve said, just like every officer across the country, you know, whether you’re in a custody suite, whether you’re dealing with a traffic accident, you know, on a country road or a motorway. Or whether you’re the response officer turning up to, you know, a sudden death or a murder. Everything leaves that trace and you’ve got to be in a position where you can get help, seek help.
But of course, the organisation, to a certain extent, has got a duty of care for you because they are putting us in that position. We’re all volunteers, you know, we have got to expect that we are going to deal with these things, I’m not taking that away. But, you know, there’s a significant amount more that could be done. It’s changing so much for the better. At the time, you know, when I became a firearms officer, you know, if you were to have a heart-to-heart and a little bit of a talk about your feelings, in an armed response vehicle back then, you’d have been probably kicked out the car, you know. [Laughs]
But thankfully, the culture’s changing, very much so. Because if we don’t talk about it, people get ill. I got ill last year, it was, you know, I was physically ill with COVID-related and I developed some mental health problems, depression, anxiety and I needed some counselling and I was very grateful to it. But during that counselling, so much stuff came out and that I thought I’d dealt with, I’d never had issues with, you know, dead people, injured people, all the traumatic sights. My shootings and such like that. And I’d be sitting in those sessions in tears, crying my eyes out and I didn’t know why, you know. And it just all built up. That probably wouldn’t have built up if I’d handled things better and spoke more and sought probably a bit of help back then.
The peer support is good but that support has got to be from top to bottom and unfortunately some of the incidents I’ve been involved in, within our department, the support has been outstanding. From, you know, our OPU commander, as a whole, you know, very well looked after. The Fed reps, Steve, without giving him too much praise, before his head gets too big, you know, is an outstanding Fed rep. Steve looked after me, you know, for a couple of bits and just absolutely amazing, you know, that help and support.
But some of the top-level support is wanting, you know. For instance, I’ve been involved in a shooting and it was quite high-profile; many of my other colleagues have been involved in similar high-profile shootings where we’ve shot a criminal or somebody with mental health issues doing very bad things has been shot. And it's almost to the point where, within the organisation at the top level, you’re ostracised. They do not want to show that support. No-one will come down with you and have a chat, from the big bosses.
But if you shoot a terrorist, there’s a queue, you know. And I’ve got colleagues that have dealt with those sorts of incidents, and don’t get me wrong, I’m not taking anything away from them, you know, they deserve that praise. But, you know, it’s, all officers who’ve been involved in those circumstances deserve that praise and should be looked after equally in the same measure. And until that happens all the time, you know, including the welfare support, you know, from the top level, then we’re going to have officers having problems. Maybe not during the incident or after the incident but in the following years.
Alexis: It’s a collective thing, isn’t it, as it happens over the years. And as you’ve said, if you don’t always acknowledge those things that have happened, it’s like – I was talking to an officer the other day and he was talking about, you know, having the kind of boxes in the warehouse. That it’s kind of gone in there, gone in there and then something happens and often it can be a physical illness that leads to the kind of emotional response, if you like. Because you’re just holding it and it’s just kind of sat there and you’re right, it’s having the right levels of support at the right times and it being recognised as well within the organisation that that is something that is going to have an impact for some people as time goes on as well.
Barry: Yeah, and I think of the nature of the type of the people that we are, we’re hesitant at seeking help. We’re good at telling people to go and get help but we’re not so good at getting it and asking for it ourselves. So, you know, that can be part of the problem. When I had my issues last year, it was a big push from my wife and a couple of close friends that made me go and get some help. And I probably wouldn’t have done for a significant period longer if they hadn’t have pushed me into the corner to get that help that I very much needed at the time.
Alexis: Absolutely and I think that’s the key thing as well, isn’t it? That it might be that you don’t particularly want to go and ask for help but if someone else says to you, and knows you well, “You need to go and ask for some help,” then you’re more likely to do it. It almost gives you permission to do that, I think. I think that’s part of it as well, isn’t it, looking out for each other as well, not just about, you know, because sometimes we don’t even notice, know we need it. And I think that’s the hard part. Steve, in your role, I guess you’re supporting a lot of people who, you know, are in similar situations or have had incidences the same as Barry’s. What do you kind of see in terms of their coping mechanisms and, you know, how do people kind of get through?
Steve: It’s sort of varied really. I mean, previously you sort of talked about the dark humour, you know, the canteen culture that we might call it. And, you know, to the untrained observer, it might seem it is very dark humour, it’s perhaps inappropriate. But when people are coping with significant amounts of stress and exposed to things that they’ve never dealt with before, what is the appropriate response, you know? Is it that archetypal stiff upper lip that, you know, the British are supposed to have, that we just get on with it, say nothing and you’ll be fine?
But it’s interesting, you talked about sort of the boxes in a warehouse and, you know, through life we go through things, everyone copes through these things very differently but they tend to compartmentalise stuff, put it in a box, put it at the back of their mind. And for me, I’m interested in what makes one person break compared to the other? Because, you know, myself and Barry, similar experiences, armed response vehicles, hundreds and hundreds of deployments, exposure to shootings, death, destruction.
But what makes me not need professional help and what made Barry need it? You know, be it physical, mental and all those kind of things that when you look at people, you think, “Yeah, that person is going to struggle with this.” And then quite often they’re not and it’s the people that have perhaps been a bit larger than life, maybe have this façade that, yeah, I’m fine but underneath, it’s tears of a clown, you know, and they’re not coping too well. And how can we do more for that?
And for me, it’s having that proper conversation and it’s – if I look at the way investigations are dealt with in the police as a whole and we have family liaison officers who deal with families of people who’ve been subject to horrendous crimes, murders, rapes, sexual assaults. But at some point, they have a disengagement process where for me, firearms officers, as a Fed rep, I’ve maintained those contacts with colleagues largely, if I possibly can because one, you know their story. You know what they’ve gone through because you've had similar experiences and it’s easy to pick up the phone and say, “Hello, mate, how are you doing?” You don’t have to talk about the job because you know it intimately because you’ve been with them, through their evidence, through inquest, through court, so you’ve got a bit of an understanding.
And it’s just that sort of random dip sampling at times, if you can. Not everybody wants it, some people just want to go, “Yeah, done the job, crack on, never speak to you again.” Absolutely fine. It’s just making sure that they realise that they’ve got someone to go to because again, in the job, we can talk about it. We can come to work as colleagues and blow off to our colleagues, “Yeah, I’ve been involved,” and they get it completely.
But perhaps if Barry couldn’t talk to his wife about the job, then – but his wife knows he’s been involved in a shooting because of what’s on the telly and she knew it was the late turn shift and he was there, how do they cope with it? Who can they turn to? Can you go and talk about your incident to your local family doctor? Because, you know, you’ve got this for you forgot to tell the reception what you’ve gone through before you see the doctor. We’ve all overheard receptionists talking on the phone, they put your name out there and, “It’s to do with a shooting, is it?” Suddenly everyone in reception knows what you’re going –
Alexis: [unintelligible 00:49:46].
Steve: Yeah. Are the medical records safe, how secure is that data? How are they referring you once they put your name down next to something which everyone’s probably seen on the news. And when there’s a police-involved shooting, it’s not just a by-line, it makes the news for 24 hours to a week. It’s really easy to find out who these people are. And how do the families cope as well because that peer support is so important. And it may be that, you know, your family and friends don’t agree with what you’ve done. It may be that they hold certain views, that they’ve tolerated you as a police officer, to a degree but now they know you’ve taken a life, that’s, whoa, way too far. And how do you put that there?
And thankfully, there is some very good network support, you know, they’ve got the PFOA – the Police Firearms Officer Association was set up because there was a lack of support for officers but also family. It’s a great charity, it’s been going for 10 years now. It’s got that support that we can put people in contact with others who have been through that kind of process. But also skilled helpers like yourself, Alexis, who are professionally trained, accredited, know how to deal with people who are going through significant events of trauma in their life. And that’s important as well. So it’s not just the officers, it’s the family; get them through it as well.
But also it helps the job because if these people don’t return to the job, then what are they going to do? You know, I’m a firm believer, give people help, give them the tools to deal with it. They are then the best people to be in that role, if they want to, to train, to speak to other people on how to cope with it. And sometimes that gets lost by senior management who just think you do one job, that’s it, you can go. I disagree. Give me evidence to show me that and I’ll think about it. But for me, someone like Barry, who’s been there, seen it, done it, is a great exponent for talking through the process, how to cope with it and to signpost other people, “Yeah, get some help.” Everybody’s got their normal self, be it completely crazy, completely quiet.
Alexis: I was going to say, it’s all different, isn’t?
Steve: Absolutely but it’s when they change from that normal self to the other person, that’s when I think they need help. And it’s getting that right intervention and, you know, most people carry on, do the job. Some people don’t, it’s too much and we fully respect that. But it’s making sure that 10, 15 years down the line, when I think, you know, maybe the early stages when PTSD could kick in, let’s contact them then. Let’s see how they’re doing, how they’re coping. And if they’re not, let’s get them some professional help.
Alexis: Yeah, definitely, it’s that, because if you’re not careful, you’re casting people adrift, aren’t you? And actually they might not be ready to access help now, it might be in a few years’ time, it could be months’ time. But actually unless you’re kind of monitoring people, you know, the long-term impacts – we see it with the military, don’t we? It’s the same type of, kind of fall out from it and you haven’t got those peers around you and that support network that’s readily available. I was thinking as well that it is having different levels of support, isn’t it, depending on what’s needed.
And you’re right, everybody’s different so we’ve all got different resiliency levels, we’ve all got, you know, it’s not just about what’s happening at work either, it could be what’s happening outside of work and, you know, it could be a million and one different things that lead to somebody starting to struggle. And actually, if it’s difficult to ask for help or you feel like there’s going to be a kind of sense of being weak for asking for help or whatever, whatever the stigma is around it. Then actually that causes massive risk within the team, doesn’t it? It causes massive risk for the individual but also within the team as well.
And I think that family reaction as well is something that isn’t really thought about, you know, that it can change somebody. If you can’t talk about it at home and it starts to affect relationships as well, it’s that just constant ripple effect. It’s looking how far that ripple effect goes and supporting as many people as possible. I know some of the work we’ve done for the Fed has been around, you know, sometimes helping the family because if we can help the family, we can help the officer, then it kind of shifts what’s going on. But if you’re only helping one aspect of that, it’s not the same impact. I think that’s something that’s definitely worth thinking about, isn’t it, for officers.
The time has flown by and it’s been fantastic to talk to you both, thank you ever so much for coming to speak to me and thank you for being so honest and open as well. I hope that people who are listening, kind of, have taken something from the conversation and as I’ve said in the other podcast, the second series – I think I said it at the beginning as well – is about all these different roles. So, you know, if people want to get in touch or if there’s any questions, are you guys happy for us to kind of forward people to you, if there’s anything they want to ask about?
Barry: Absolutely.
Steve: Yeah, more than happy to help out, do what we can. That’s what we’re there for, to try and help people negotiate what they’re going through, what they may go through just so that they can, you know, cope with it long-term.
Alexis: Yeah, that’s brilliant, thank you. Thanks, Steve, thanks, Barry, nice to see you both. And we’ll, there’ll be other episodes going out gradually over the second series, we’re going to put them out separately rather than together. So, thanks, everybody, take care.
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